Turkish “Delight”

Remember The Chronicles of Narnia? More specifically, remember The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe? Remember how Edmond was so tempted by Turkish Delight? I tried it. I will never want it again. Take a look at the name of this post. Notice how Delight is in quotes. Yeah, it’s that bad.




There’s what the box looks like. I imagine a trollface right under delight. Just sitting there going “Hey, this is definitely good. It’s not gonna trigger a gag reflex.”



There we go. That’s what I see when I look at the box now. Better yet, let’s add some quotes to this.


Yeah, that’s perfect. Now, let’s talk about the ingredients. I’m going to show a picture of those. You guys won’t need any explanation there.



Behold, the most random ingredients list that ever existed. I guess they were thinking “Oh! This stuff is good in stuff! Let’s put it all together and see what comes out!”

And the flavors don’t really work with each other the way they do them! What about there?! “Let’s take some Rose flavored gelatin and put some pistachios in it and throw in some lemon for good measure!”

What’s even worse is that there isn’t much flavor at all when there is! Why would you want to do that to yourself!?

I think there should be a “Good Luck” right under the ingredients list.



Oh, wait. I think I forgot something.



Much better. Now let’s address that expiration date. There shouldn’t be an expiration date. It should be a best by date. It should read “Best by: Never”



And that picture just about sums up Turkish Delight.

Now I’m going to ask the question several readers by now are asking “If Turkish Delight is so terrible, why was Edmond so tempted by it in the book and movie?”

It’s like he enjoys putting stuff that doesn’t taste good in his mouth. But it’s unsanitary to take crap and eat it. How could you like this stuff? It blows my mind to think that some people like it.

I’ve got it! It’s because he was so painfully British! So he wanted this candy that only the British would like. That must be it!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my rant about Turkish “Delight” and I’m looking forward to the next funny thing to post.



What I’ve learned in Computer Literacy

Those of you that are reading this because you read my blog from time to time and noticed I have a new post, you may ignore this post. It’s just for school.

I’ve learned several things in Computer Literacy, a course I have as an elective this semester.

For one, I’ve learned to proofread my stuff. It can get really embarrassing to realize you use grammar that doesn’t make sense or, misspell words that are easy.

I’ve learned how to use Google calendar. Strangely enough, I didn’t even know it existed before I started the course.

I learned about formatting documents. I didn’t know what my teachers were talking about when they told me to double space my essays. It was a bit embarrassing.

(Picture credit to K12, obviously)

wub wub wub

Hey guys, I’m that guy and I have posted more things on my youtube channel since last blog post. I haven’t edited my foam building videos yet, but I don’t think I will post my sword video. I made fun of nature tracks and minecraft and I made minecraft nature tracks, I like how they turned out and there are many more to come. I am currently working on a LEGO minecraft stop motion and it is not even close to being done. I made a dubstep song that has aleredy gotten almost 50 views. Lets see if all my reader can bump it up a little.

Have fun!


Hey guys! Sorry I haven’t posted in a while, I’ve been trying to do school work but now it’s summer. I have already done a few things that I will get to in just a minute. I have a new video posted on my youtube channel, if you guys don’t already know, it’s epic0217. I will have some more videos up at the end of the week. Today I made some stuff out of duct tape and foam. The first thing I made was a foam sword. It could have come out a lot better. If you guys watch the video of me making it at the end of the week, there are three things for you to remember that I didn’t. DON’T RUSH THROUGH IT. If you rush through making the sword, you will not end up with a good looking one. CUT THE FOAM ACCURATELY. I didn’t cut the foam very well and the hand guard wasn’t quite right. PLACE THE TAPE WISELY. My sword resembled a piece of crap because I didn’t place it right.

Another thing that I made was a TARDIS from Doctor Who. I am using it as a decoration and I could have put another layer of foam in it. It turned out fairly well as a decoration and I meant for it to be a TARDIS stress ball, but it turned out more like a TARDIS sport ball. I guess I can play dodge-TARDIS now. This creation will end up in most of my videos showing up in the background of the frames.

I also made an opening TARDIS and I think it turned out rather well. It has a few rough edges and I could have sized the roof better, but I have an opening TARDIS container now. I will get another fiberglass rod from Tractor Supply Co. next time I make it by there. I will eventually remake the Master sword, but it will not be the next sword I make.

I have a small length of fiberglass that I will use to make a knife. Hopefully it’ll turn out better than my sword did. I  hope you guys enjoy my videos.

Really awesome dream

I had a dream the other day that I kind of have to share. It took place in the future. It began with me waking up in a jail, I had no idea why I was there, but I was. I had an earpiece in my ear, “Good you’re awake.” a voice said from the earpiece.

I looked around for a second, “Who is this?” I asked.

The voice said “I cannot say my name right now, but you will figure it out soon enough.”

I looked around again, “How did I get here?” I asked.

” Wow, you must have hit your head pretty hard.” the voice said, “During an assignment-”

I interrupted “Assignment? Am I like some sort of bounty hunter or something?”.

The voice answered “In a sense, but you aren’t hunting for people. you’re keeping most of them hidden.

“Well, looks like I won’t be doing that for at least a few weeks.” I said.

The voice replied “You really don’t remember how this works, do you?”

A guard walked out and pressed a button, all of the jail doors opened. He called out “Lunch, eat it while you can.

I followed the crowd to the mess hall. I didn’t really know what I was supposed to do in a jail other than not get on anyone’s bad side. I grabbed my tray and sat  alone.

The voice said “You really want this for weeks to years?”

“No, is there a way I can bypass the time?” I asked.

A fire broke out in the mess hall, the sirens started.

The voice now on the intercom said “Emergency, all inmates evacuate the area.”

Everyone ran for the exit, but the voice directed me through the jail in my earpiece again. Avoiding the guards was the hardest part and yet it was easy.

“Stop right there!” a guard said.

We were all directed back to the mess hall, when we finished lunch, we were directed to our cells.

In a quieter voice, I said “It didn’t work. Do you have another plan?”

Another inmate had gotten hold of a book of matches. He lit one and destroyed the control panel on all of the cells. they all opened, luckily there were no guards around. The inmate was apparently very smart because he got everyone to be very quiet.

He found me and said quietly “Hey, I’m your back up plan.”

I silently went through the halls and corridors. I didn’t have to avoid guards this time because they had assumed that all the inmates were asleep.

The voice told me “Go straight ahead and you should find a very thick door, I’ll work on unlocking it while you walk there.”

I said “Okay but make it quick, I see the door right now.”

I slowly and silently walked up to the door. In the hope that the person unlocked it, I turned the huge ring shaped handle. It opened, groaning I tried to keep the door as quiet as possible by opening it extremely slowly.

“Alright, look for the gun that’s different from all the others.” said the voice.

I picked the gun up. It seemed strangely familiar, but I didn’t have time to think about it. Two guards started walking up to the armory.

The voice explained “In primary fire mode, your gun is like a standard Full auto weapon, I’ll explain the rest in a little bit. You need to take care of a couple of guards.”

I walked over to where they couldn’t see me when they came in.

When they walked over into the Vault like room I said “I’m sorry, am I interrupting something?”

I raised my gun and pulled the trigger on the first guard. his helmet was knocked off revealing that he was a robot. I took the stock of my gun and bashed it’s head off. It wasn’t the best idea I had that day.

“Take that ya’ stinkin’ machine!” I yelled.

The other one raised his gun into firing position as I did a somersault, pointed my gun at him and fired. I got a few shots off right into his face.

“Robots, zero. Me, two.” I said as I walked out of the armory.

There were a bunch of guards when I walked out, I quickly went back in and locked the door behind me.

“Okay, no time to explain. Use secondary fire!” the voice yelled.

I switched modes on my gun and opened the door. I fired, a red glowing sphere pushed itself out of my gun’s muzzle. It hit the ground. For a second, nothing happened. Then it exploded. We were knocked in all directions. I hit the least soft spot, The armory door. I was slammed against the circular iron door. strangely, I was the only one that survived.

“So that’s secondary fire.” I said.

The voice laughed and said “You should move on.”

I stealthily made my way through the jail until I found an exit.

“Okay, the extent of Guards on the inside of the walls is a team of snipers.” said the voice.

I saw that it was now dawn. I didn’t realize I had been up all night. I ran to the side of the wall trying to avoid the view of the guards and their rifles. I found a metal door. I tried to turn the handle but it was locked.

The voice told me “there is an unlocked door on the other side of the jail, but you’ll have to risk your life to get there.”

“Dang it! I wish you would tell me these things earlier.” I replied.

I took my gun and slammed the stock into the door. It broke the mechanism inside causing the door to open as the voice was telling me there was no shortcut.

“I just made one!” I yelled at the voice.

The voice said ” Oh, I didn’t think of that.”

I ran up the spiral staircase. I turned off my earpiece because the voice was starting to go on and on. When I reached the top I picked a knife off of the floor and stabbed him with it.

I said “Hey buddy, you dropped this.”

it didn’t occur to me that he was a robot until he turned around and hit me in the chest with his gun. I got up coughing.

I said “Oh, you want to play like that?”

I smacked my stock into his face. His helmet came off. I grabbed his rifle and threw him off the tower head first. I used the rifle to take care of two of the other snipers and walked over to where I could shoot the last one. He spotted me and surrendered. he gave me a high tech suit of armor he called a RIG. I didn’t know what RIG stood for, but I could now easily navigate due to the helmet, I could take a few hits, and I was disguised as a guard. My new found ally and I walked out of the facility without having to have more trouble.

one guard told me to be on the lookout for, well, me.

I turned my earpiece back on again and said “Are you done rambling?”

The voice was clearly annoyed “Yeah, and I thought you were dead.”

“Well no need to worry anymore.” I said humorously.

“No need? There are two guards dragging you!” the voice said.

“No there aren’t. I’m disguised as a guard. I’m not going to get caught.” I said.

The voice said “Not by a guard.”

Just then, a guard shorter than the rest grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side.

“Do you realize how much trouble you almost got yourself into?” the guard asked.

“Do you realize you are different from all the other guards?” I asked jokingly.

The guard took off it’s helmet, but it turned out to be a she. she looked as me with an almost hypnotic stare.

“Do you remember me?” she asked.

“no but you sound like the voice.” I answered.

“We had never met had we?” she said smiling.

“What?” I asked because it seemed silly for her to ask me if I had met her before I had lost my memories.

She put her helmet on and said “Let’s go.”

“1135, come on.” I said to my robo-friend.

the three of us walked out of the jail and split up. I walked to a house that I figured was where I needed to go. When I walked in, the person had a gun to my head. I set my gun down and took my helmet off. When he saw that it was me, he put his gun down and started going through his stuff. He pulled out a USB drive.

“What’s on it?” I asked.

“The future.” he replied.

“What exactly is on this drive?” I asked in a slightly more threatening tone.

“I cannot tell you quite yet.” he said smiling.

I stuffed the thing into my pocket and started out of the house grabbing my gun and helmet. I somehow knew where I needed to go.

I walked up to another guard and said “I need the keys to one of the jeeps.”

He just held them out and escorted me to one of them. I got the red one, of course. I decided not to take my helmet off and destroy the robot because if I revealed myself, I would be very easy to find. I drove off. I used my RIG navigation system to get me to the place I needed to get. I walked to an input center. there were tens of thousands USB ports everywhere. I stuck my drive into one of the ports and the lights on the ceiling lit up blue.

“Blast fall cannon production started.” a mechanical voice stated.

I sighed in relief and said “Good, now I can go home and-”

“Lock-down sequence initiated.” the voice interrupted.

“Dang it! Abort lock-down!” I yelled.

“Invalid command.” explained the computer generated voice.

“Shut down Lock-down initialization!” I called out.

“Invalid command.” the computer stated again.

I ran out of the factory just slipping under the last door. When I got back up, I saw the jail guards, all of them. I knew I couldn’t take that many guards at once so I just put my hands up and let them take me back to jail.

When I was in my cell siting on the bed, I saw someone out of the corner of my eye. he wasn’t a guard. he wasn’t even wearing a RIG. He was a tall man wearing a suit. He walked up to my cell.

“You’ve got talent, kid.” he said.

I was sitting there looking down at the floor as he gave me the complement.

Not really conscious, I replied “Been at it for a while.”

He threw a familiar looking RIG onto the floor in front of me. I didn’t realize that the jail door was open.

I leaned back onto the wall and said “Why did I ever rope myself into this assignment?”

“I don’t know, but I do know how you can clear your name.” he said as he sat down next to me “I also know that you know in what way I’m talking about.”

I sighed and looked down at the RIG, then up at the man.

“Make your decision, keep it up living here, or get out and actually make a difference.” He said.

The man said “I’ll be in the mess hall.”

I was left siting there, with a choice. Stay here for the rest of my life, or clear my name and actually help people. I looked around and saw the other people. I remembered that I had ‘helped’ them before. I realized that what I had done was just putting a delay on when they went to jail.

I looked down at the RIG and picked it up. It was silver with red paint streaks on it. It was beat up. Probably from my last assignment. I put it on, it fit perfectly. I remembered that it had been custom made. I walked down through the hall to the mess hall. I saw the man sitting at a table cleaning my gun.

I said “I’ve made my choice.”

The man handed me my gun and said “Welcome back.”

As we walked though the hall, he filled me in on this assignment. I only half listened because I knew what I needed to do. I walked up to the red jeep and got in. I drove over to the factory that I activated the production of the cannon  at. I got out with my gun and walked over to the door keypad.

“Open.” I said.

“Command not accepted.” said the keypad.

“Disengage bolts.” I said.

“Unable to complete task. Lock-down mode active.” the keypad replied.

I got into shooting position and shot into the keypad, and the doors opened. I walked in and looked at the production of the blast fall cannon. Apparently, the factory was serious when it went into lock-down mode because it had created robots with guns to guard the building. I picked my gun up and shot at the first one I saw.

“Security compromised.” a robot said as it opened fire.

Luckily, my RIG was bullet-proof. I rolled over and shot the robot straight through the head and into the one behind it. Both robots fell instantly. One attacked from behind me and I dropped my gun. I was in a head lock. I grabbed the machine’s arms and leaned forward hard. The thing slammed into the ground and shattered. The robots weren’t terribly tough, but there were a lot of them. I finished my attack on the robot army by switching my gun to full auto and sprayed into the crowd. they all fell. I knew it would be difficult to stop the factory with primary fire so I switched to secondary and started to scout around. I looked through the factory until I saw the core. It was a large glass bulb with red waves flowing through it. I thought it looked like a giant plasma ball light. I aimed my gun and fired straight into the middle. The bulb shattered and a huge explosion took place inside the factory. I flew up, and my gun blew out of my hand. I blacked out and had no idea how bad that idea was.

“Is he going to be alright?” I faintly heard.

I groaned and opened my eyes. I looked around as many people gathered around me and helped me up. Apparently, I had became famous in the last few minutes. I wasn’t moving very fast due to every part of my body screaming in pain. I was starting to become more aware of my surroundings when everyone cleared.

The man walked up to me and said “Congratulations, you’ve successfully finished your first mission from me. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just in extreme pain. Do you know where my gun ended up?” I said.

He replied “No, I’m sorry it’s just-”

he fell silent as my gun fell from the sky at an extreme speed and landed in front of me.

“Wow” I said “I almost died.”

I picked my gun up and put the sling on my shoulder.

“I have another assignment for you. Take it when you’re not in pain.” said the man.

That’s when I woke up.

Twentieth Post-aversery II

You guys may have been waiting for this for a while, It’s Twentieth Post-aversery. This time I got a couple questions from a person named Yousif.

1. What do you imagine yourself doing  5 years from now?

I imagine I will be living at a different place either going to college or finding something to do for myself.

2. Do any of the job titles in the presentation look like they’d be a good fit for you?

I think that owning a business is the way to go because there is nobody above you in that  business so nobody bosses you around unless they’re being a jerk.

Since I didn’t get many questions I will show this cool video I found.


My next post will be the Twentieth post-aversery II, so I will be taking a break for a few weeks so you can post questions. When I come back, I will answer the questions. If there aren’t any questions, I will have to figure something else out. it may or may not be as interesting. I will be waiting for questions, so please put some in so I can answer them. Post them in the comments.

One step closer

Hey guys, I’m That Guy. I recently got a camera, so I’m one step closer to making that Slenderman short film. I now have a camera for creating youtube videos. I will have to do some revising on my script, though. I will be creating many live action short films. I hope you all enjoy them. I know I will enjoy making them. That is just about all I have to say in this post. It’s getting dangerously close to my second twentieth post-aversery so I need some questions. Please leave them in the comments.

Creepy video series

Last night I saw a really creepy video series about the Slenderman. The videos are fake, but so is the Slenderman. The video was very well put together, but there are a few mistakes. The first one that I saw was pretty darn obvious. The American man from Vermont was played by an Irish man who didn’t even try to hide the accent. That is the only error I can think of at the moment. I thought that the videos were really creepy, and I would definitely watch them again. If you would like to see these videos, then go to youtube, search Slender man Documentary, and the series is the 5 part one. See what errors you can find and post them in the comments on this post, and tell me if you enjoyed the videos.

More spam

Hey guys, sorry I didn’t really post on a schedule last week and the week before. I have gotten a whole lot of spam since last time I posted about it. I have gone through tons of it. I got a whole bunch of purse ads. Now these spambots are really weird  even though I know that the only find different words in the posts. I have gotten countless Michael Korrs spam. I think that the spambots should at least look at the username and figure out the person’s gender because I am tired of getting ads for purses to That GUY.

As I did last time I posted about this, I have gotten lots of  spam about NFL jerseys. Because every single person on the face of the planet likes NFL. Yeah, I want to know how to block comments from websites like that because I get really annoyed at: “your location is valuable to us.” and “your talents would come in handy.”. The spam comments aren’t even using any new posts. I want to know how to keep those spambots from spamming me because that spam just isn’t funny anymore.

Last but not least, there is one website that  spams me by saying something like: “I like your blog, can you check mine out?”. When they do this, they link to some chatting website that is about a ton of random crap. I always think: “because blogs can definitely be forum websites.”. I do make fun of these in my head. Let’s see what you guys can come up with on making fun of these. Have fun with it and post the ways in the comments.