Turkish “Delight”

Remember The Chronicles of Narnia? More specifically, remember The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe? Remember how Edmond was so tempted by Turkish Delight? I tried it. I will never want it again. Take a look at the name of this post. Notice how Delight is in quotes. Yeah, it’s that bad.

 

 

TDbox

There’s what the box looks like. I imagine a trollface right under delight. Just sitting there going “Hey, this is definitely good. It’s not gonna trigger a gag reflex.”

TDtf

 

There we go. That’s what I see when I look at the box now. Better yet, let’s add some quotes to this.

TDtfquotes

Yeah, that’s perfect. Now, let’s talk about the ingredients. I’m going to show a picture of those. You guys won’t need any explanation there.

TDingredients

 

Behold, the most random ingredients list that ever existed. I guess they were thinking “Oh! This stuff is good in stuff! Let’s put it all together and see what comes out!”

And the flavors don’t really work with each other the way they do them! What about there?! “Let’s take some Rose flavored gelatin and put some pistachios in it and throw in some lemon for good measure!”

What’s even worse is that there isn’t much flavor at all when there is! Why would you want to do that to yourself!?

I think there should be a “Good Luck” right under the ingredients list.

TDGL

 

Oh, wait. I think I forgot something.

TDGLTFQ

 

Much better. Now let’s address that expiration date. There shouldn’t be an expiration date. It should be a best by date. It should read “Best by: Never”

TDGLTFQBBN

 

And that picture just about sums up Turkish Delight.

Now I’m going to ask the question several readers by now are asking “If Turkish Delight is so terrible, why was Edmond so tempted by it in the book and movie?”

It’s like he enjoys putting stuff that doesn’t taste good in his mouth. But it’s unsanitary to take crap and eat it. How could you like this stuff? It blows my mind to think that some people like it.

I’ve got it! It’s because he was so painfully British! So he wanted this candy that only the British would like. That must be it!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my rant about Turkish “Delight” and I’m looking forward to the next funny thing to post.

 

 

N.O.V.A. 2 the Half Life of android devices

I recently got an app on my Kindle Fire, and it was the coolest first person shooter I had ever played. N.O.V.A. 2 is a first person game where you have tons of guns to have fun with. N.O.V.A. stands for near orbit vanguard alliance. The first mode is single player, where the storyline is about escaping the government which is apparently working with aliens. I think there is eventually a level where you get to kill tons of aliens, I look forward to that level. In multiplayer mode you can play with friends or with people worldwide. You can unleash your destructive side by killing every one in sight, you can be like people in team fortress 2 and kill all the people in the other team, you can play freeze tag using guns to stop people in their tracks, or you can play a… not so classic version of capture the flag. There are a LOT of weapons and more ways to use them. I give this app a ten out of ten.

please comment, and leave your twentieth post-aversery questions in the comments.

school login crap

I am starting to have issues with k12, because the system needs improvement. A lot of improvement. I can’t sign in to the classes right now apparently. Every time I try it says I need to restart the browser like I did four times. I’m not going to put up with that crap. I also keep getting ”k-mails” telling me I need to go to class connects when they have been having issues too! I am not far away from ripping my hair out. In a perfect world, k12 wouldn’t barf. To make a long story short, I hate it when k12 messes up.

Duct tape, The worlds most useful thing.

Who would have thought that a certain kind of tape would be used so often. I have used my duct tape a lot. I made a wallet, phone holster, miniature working boat, fedora, and I’m making a flower, all out of duct tape. I have seen cases where people have made shoes out of duct tape. There are tons of uses for it. I don’t think it can fix everything, but it can fix a lot of things. It isn’t  the perfect solution to everything but it is a solution to a bunch of things. I think it is the most commonly used tape in the US. It can do so many things that you can’t do with regular tape. It is stronger, thicker, and waterproof. It’s also extremely fun to make stuff with and it is a good source for entertainment. Duct tape is awesome.

leave twentieth post-aversity questions in the comments and share what cool things you may have made with duct tape. I will have the twentieth post-aversity up by Friday afternoon, so enter in questions by then.

Super Mario Galaxy review

Hey guys, time for another review, but this time it’s on something extremely popular. Super Mario Galaxy is a video game that has many realistic things… other than all the concepts. I really like the way the water looks because it looks like real water unless your in it. The storyline is really awesome, unlike the other Mario games where Bowser kidnaps the princess for some odd reason. He violently invites her to the creation of a new galaxy in the center of the universe and brings her and the castle into space to see it. Mario then plays hide and seek with star shaped creatures called lumas. when Mario catches the last luma, he meets princess Rosalina, who gives him a luma so he can travel through the universe by spinning on star shaped objects called sling stars and launch stars. There is a two player mode that isn’t as good as the other Mario games where two people can play at the same time, but I guess it’s okay. In two player mode the second player collects money, freezes enemies and can make Mario jump. Most of the enemies are annoying, there is the: Goomba, bullet bill, little awkward looking Goomba things that come in pink and blue, Koopas, and magic Koopas. There are fat lumas that  are holding wands in each hand, and if you feed them, they commit suicide by exploding and turning into galaxies. Over all I think the people who made the game were either Japanese or on drugs, or quite possibly both. Even though the game is frustrating at times it is a good one. In a one to ten rating I give it a ten, so that is five stars.

Streamlight Microstream review

A few months ago I got a Streamlight Microstream. I am very happy with the performance it gave me. I put it through the washer four or five times, and it still worked. I went swimming with it and turned it on under water and it worked a lot. The lens was foggy from the inside, but it still worked. I think the reason it finally broke was because of a very much delayed reaction. My only complaints are that it needs more waterproofing, and a better coating, but over all it is a great camping tool, and it is a good flashlight to drag around in the woods. If I were to give it a one to ten rating I would give it an eight. so that would be four out of five stars.

mari0

There is a game called mari0 which is pretty funny. It’s a combination of Portal and Super Mario Brothers. You can change Mario’s appearance and hat to any color. There are also 33 different hats including a rainbow dash hat. All the different hats make the game hilarious. the portal gun is also very useful in the Mario world. The game also has a portal ”map pack” where the game is inside aperture laboratories which is where Portal and Portal 2 take place.
http://stabyourself.net/mari0/